Running Heads

From the editors of Cascade Books and Pickwick Publications at Wipf and Stock Publishers

Favorite Theological Jokes

Readers who have been to seminary, or had other advanced theological training—as well as those who have not—have probably heard a variety of theological jokes. I’d love to hear from you with your own favorite theological joke. Here, to get the ball rolling, is mine:

What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an agnostic, and a dyslexic?

Someone who lies awake at night wondering if there is a dog.

Kindly submit your own favorite (or favorites) in the comments field. I’ll be delighted to publish my new favorites in a later post.


  1. One of my favorite jokes is from Mike Bird’s “Evangelical Theology”:

    A Calvinist arrives at St. Peter’s gates and sees that there are two queues going in. One is marked “predestined,” and the other is marked “free will.” Being the card-carrying Calvinist that he is, he strolls on over to the predestined queue. After several moments an angel asks him, “Why are you in this line?” He replies, “Because I chose it.” The angel looks surprised, “Well, if you ‘chose’ it, then you should be in the free will line.” So our Calvinist, now slightly miffed, obediently wanders over to the free will line. Again, after a few minutes, another angel asks him, “Why are you in this line?” He sullenly replies, “Someone made me come here.”

  2. Q. What was the outcome of the last Vatican Council?
    A. Vatican II. Latin 0.


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